Wednesday, December 31, 2014

Gazing At A New Datebook For A New Year

Pages flip with cooperation of
Index finger and thumb.
A purr of flickering whiteness:
Respectful, quiet, numb.

It’s way too soon to divine what
Kind of year it will be:
The handwriting isn’t on the wall
Where anyone can see.

A prayer descends like a shadow
Eager to be bestowing
Strength to deal with whatever
Spitballs fate is throwing.


Tuesday, December 30, 2014

Embattled Rep. Scalisi Claims He Was Unaware He Gave A Speech To White Supremacists

Steve must’ve done this when he was really young
Which is a perfectly honest defense.
So, cut him some slack! Wait: he was thirty-seven?
Oh, then these complaints make sense.

Monday, December 29, 2014

Thoughts About Our Digital Age

Those who are convinced that apps will be
A perennial should be aware
They’re perhaps like wine coolers from back
When Bruce Willis had hair.

Mulling Over That New Seth Rogan-James Franco Movie

The interview in "The Interview"
Is nothing more than slick hoax:
Freedom's just another word
For lots and lots of dick jokes.


Wednesday, December 24, 2014

A Post-9/11 Christmas

(This took place circa 2008.)

An L.A. Valley College parking lot had been
Appropriated during these
Weeks before Santa’s arrival to sell some fir,
Pine, cedar & cypress trees.

There weren’t many trees left. The salesman
(A sleazy “Jersey Shore” kind of guido)
Was barking into his phone, one imagines to
His stewardess girlfriend in San Pedro.

Then he saw her walk onto the lot: somehow
I sensed this would be an epic fail.
She was tiny, quiet, from the Middle East and
(Good guess) was wearing a veil.

He forced a smile at her. She nodded and then he
Said into his cell, “I’d like to fling this
Muslim woman right off the lot --- I’d bet heavy
She can barely speak a word of English.”

She hovered beside the saddest tree on the lot --- to him
This was worthy of derisive laughter.
It didn’t look like a tree anyone took home but like those
Seen unsold on a lot the day after.

“How much?” she asked. He gazed with contempt
And then blurted out, “Fifty.” One
Then noticed she gave him the once over and felt
That he, not she, was the shifty one.

He just lost it. “Get the hell out of here. Go home
To your Koran and your kebobs ---
You … people … please … you disgust me with your
Body odor & convenience store jobs.”

She knew she was being disrespected in ways
That made her feel both hated & also dirty.
Her vocabulary was limited but sufficient: she
Looked at him, the tree & shot back, “Thirty.”

Did this piss him off? Do you really have to ask?
Oh, yeah. Not a little but plenty.
He swore and yelled and then swore some more
Until she calmly replied, “Twenty.”

I left before this transaction ended which sort of
Makes it difficult to finish this poem:
I bet she kept haggling until he broke down and
Gave her $10 to take it and go home.


Thursday, December 18, 2014

Boston Uber Driver Accused Of Rape

It seems when this company does its hiring
It so often manages to get jerks:
It’s officially become the Bill Cosby of app-
Based transportation networks.…/alejandro-done-boston-uber-…

Wednesday, December 17, 2014

Ed Ruscha

New York had Warhol
Toss him a bouquet
But Los Angeles has
The artist Ed Ruscha.

His cool word paintings
Are sly, often jokey
(Ruscha, by the way, is
A bona fide Okie.)

“Art is something that
Makes you scratch your head”
Is something that Ruscha
Once memorably said.

Ruscha’s very first books? They
Were all DIY
Most bookstores didn’t want ‘em
Which is why

Ed asked a guy named Joe
To please give ‘em a look
And maybe put them on
Shelves of the Book Nook:

Joe’s teensy bookstore, just
A tiny part
Of Brentwood’s Brentwood
Country Mart.

Joe said okay and soon his
Customers did see
These most curious art books
Practically for free.

This guy who I knew way way
Back in the day
Bought every Ruscha book there
But gave ‘em away

To friends as hip gifts, totally lacking
The rationale to
Realize these would wind up as things
Of great value.

Good guess: I was that guy and this poor
Judgment broke my heart.
However, it later made me regard myself
As a work of Art.

What a dope! What was I thinking? I often
Want to yell. Still
If that doesn’t make you scratch your head,
What the hell will?

Friday, December 5, 2014

Headline In The Guardian: “Christie cleared again of involvement in New Jersey ‘Bridgegate’ scandal”

This decision was recently reached by what
One could characterize as acres
Of people who are known to the public as
New Jersey state lawmakers.

Good for Chris! It’ll all clear sailing now ---
No one should be in any way hesitant
To immediately stop calling him “Governor”
And start calling him “Mr. President.”

Goodbye, Garden State! Hello, Washington D.C.!
Hold on --- I don’t really want to hit a dissonant
Note, but I just saw the story’s last line: “The US
Attorney’s office is still investigating the incident.”

Gee, that takes all of the fun out of that headline
And makes me a bit wary --- it
Seems like accidentally putting the lead in a hole,
If not actually deciding to bury it.…/chris-christie-cleared-again-n…


Bill Cosby’s Shocking New Accuser: Dr. Cliff Huxtable

The fictional obstetrician on "The Cosby Show"
In 1988 was on quite a roll
When he met Cosby one night at a jazz festival
At the Hollywood Bowl.

"Bill invited me to the Playboy Mansion and
He was very polite, not frisky,
As he suggested I drink a glass of what he
Said was 75-year-old whiskey.”

I woke up disoriented & naked hours later
And wasn’t feeling any better
When I saw Mr. Cosby wearing nothing but
My ugly, multi-colored sweater.

Cosby said I’d had too much to drink ---
What he did next gave me a chill:
He walked near the bed I was in, winked
And gave me a $100 dollar bill.”

Dr. Huxtable wiped away a tear & admitted,
“I’m lucky to still be alive.
I had a thriving practice then. $100? Really?
I was worth at least 5.”…/uploads/2013/08/cosby-sweater_o…


Thursday, December 4, 2014

I Take Back Every Bad Thing I’ve Written About Cosby

(That is, however, if I get Bill 
To agree
To give me an honorary

He literally gave one to singer Jill Scott in May
Which anyone with a brain may feel
Is the reason she’s spoken up on Twitter about
How Bill has lately gotten a raw deal.

The bottom line is I’m willing to help Bill
During his bitter current adversity
But only with a signed contract promising
A degree from Temple University.)…/jill_scott_receives_honorary_docto…


Wednesday, December 3, 2014

New Sexual Abuse Allegation About Cosby Involves A 15-Year-Old Girl In 1974

I’m quite dumbfounded but not by this claim.
My incredulity simply is this:
How did Bill find time away from forced sex
For a career in show business?

Why Cosby Had To Step Down From Temple University Board

One victim was from that school
Where Mr. Cosby was a trustee.
It reminds us of that children’s
Charity run by Jerry Sandusky.

Tuesday, December 2, 2014

“Rookie Black Cop Who Repeatedly Shot Wealthy Unarmed White Teen Won’t Face Charges”

Change is needed in America but the speed
At which it moves is often glacial.
The day that headline is real --- not fake ---
Will mean our society’s post-racial.