Monday, July 9, 2012
Reason #17 Why Romney Will Never Agree To Any Town Hall Meetings
A coed raises her hand. “Governor,
I wonder about your essential beliefs.
Regarding underwear, do you prefer
Magic boxers … or magic briefs?”
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Temple_garment
Saturday, July 7, 2012
Chris Christie’s Jersey Shore Meltdown With Pro-Teacher Passerby
In the annals of famous fat tough guys,
Gangster Al Capone
Deployed a baseball bat and for that is
Still widely known.
And here the Garden State
Was heard to piss and moan
Looking something less than macho
Wielding an ice cream cone.
Perhaps he was so mad because he was caught
Having this non-dietetic treat
The kind of food he swore to his doctors & wife
He knows better than to eat.
In any event, the only thing
About him
You could honestly call thin
Is his skin.
http://www.nj.com/news/index.ssf/2012/07/boardwalk_brawl_gov_christie_i.html#incart_mce
Katie Holmes Came To Her Senses & Dumped Tom Cruise
Good for you, sweetie --- I’m sure this wasn’t easy.
You’re happy as a clam since your ship
Has come in. By the way, it must be nice now to not
Have a stupid clam you have to worship.
If you’re a brainwashed scientologist out to censor
People trashing your cult with duplicity,
Please feel free to mention my name & my blog ---
(Truth be told, I could use the publicity.)
Friday, July 6, 2012
Romney Campaign Lets Criticism Of His Sending Jobs Overseas Go Unanswered
Mitt’s inability to have these attacks confronted
Suggests he’s endorsed
The idea of having all of his domestic surrogates
Be similarly outsourced.
Thursday, July 5, 2012
What Does It Take To Take The Prize At Nathan’s Contest? 68 Hot Dogs.
Only here in America
I can happily report
Is an eating disorder
Classified as a sport.
People are obese, people are starving
Times are lean, hopes are thin.
But hey (who cares?) Joey Chestnut
Just got his 6th straight win!
Wednesday, July 4, 2012
Prehistoric Restaurant Review On Yelp
Meat that's had contact with ... flames?
Don't even bother looking.
Fire is just a fad and so is this fancy
New trend called cooking.
Don’t get me started on the Stone Age decor.
It’s unbearable.
I don’t know what “service” is but trust me:
Theirs is terrible.
Monday, July 2, 2012
Egypt’s New President Vows To Win The Release Of World Trade Center Bomber
Mohammed Morsi wants to free the blind cleric:
Seriously? I guess this is probably a case
Of a guy who feels this is the best time for him
To throw some red shawarma to his base.
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