Thursday, September 21, 2017

Some Of The Countries That Don’t Extradite To The United States or Dumb Things That Trump Has To (Again) Try & Memorize Today

Afghanistan and Kazakhstan,
Algeria and Eritrea,
Angola and Moldova,
Bahrain and Ukraine,
Cambodia and Ethiopia,
Micronesia and Tunisia,
Macedonia and Mongolia,
Madagascar and Qatar,
Nepal and Senegal,
Rwanda and Uganda,
And --- to be fair --- it would be such a
Mistake to forget Nambia and-or Russia.


Monday, September 18, 2017

Stanislav Petrov (1939-2017)

He was a Russian duty officer who one
Day in 1983 happened to enter
Into history for what he did at an early
Warning system command center.

Petrov received a shocking report with the
Potential to alter all our fates:
A handful of missiles had been launched at
Russia from the United States.

His response to this alert was one that
Could’ve brought him glory:
Launch a nuclear attack that was swift
Fierce and retaliatory.

To be absolutely clear here, Petrov
Could see right before his eyes
Global war against not only the U.S.
But also its Western allies.

The world kept on spinning on its axis and
Humanity suffered no harm
Because he sensed something wasn’t right
And felt it was a false alarm.

He figured if the United States wanted
To not see any Russians alive
They would have sent many hundreds
Of its missiles, not merely five.

Petrov (a Red) put it all, if you will, on red
And was right at this junction:
It turned out their satellite warning system
Had a serious malfunction.

If faced with a crisis, be calm like Petrov ---
Is your enemy attacking or bluffing
Or perhaps making a mistake? Sometimes,
The best thing to do is … nothing.


Friday, June 23, 2017

Best. Valley. Video. Ever.

Randy Newman name-checked the Valley twice in
“I Love L.A.”
Good for him but the Valley deserves it’s own song.
I’m happy to say

“Want You Back” is just that courtesy of
Those three girls in Haim.
Having something to represent the 818?
It's welcome & about time.

There’s nothing in the lyrics about the region but
The video is keen
To evoke this place --- it’s the most Valley thing
I have ever seen.

Once you see this video, you’ll want to drive at dawn
To Ventura Boulevard and then on your feet
Head west past Casa de Cadillac as you proudly walk
Right down the middle of the fucking street.

Monday, April 3, 2017

April Multi-tasks As The Awareness Month For Poetry & Autism

From A To Z                                    

While driving in the car with my son
(Who has autism) it may get
To a point where to calm him down,
I suggest he recite the alphabet.

Jeremy’s thirty, so sometimes just
What my wife and I are doing
May seem a peculiar avenue at this
Point for us to be pursuing.

We alternate saying each letter and this
Does help him relax
Simultaneously reminding the three of us
Of a few basic facts

Like how the English-speaking world uses
These symbols in heavy rotation
In our ongoing attempts with other people
To engage in communication.

When we do these duets of the ABCs ---
A father and a son and a mother ---
We’re in touch on a granular level with
How people reach out to each other.

This is the best way I can describe this and
I hope this can bring about for you
The gist of what I’m thinking. If not, there’s
No other way to spell it out for you.


Thursday, January 19, 2017

Mic Drop For Barack

I love how his opponents across the aisle have
Always thought victory was in reach
If they somehow provoked him so much that
He had to go out and give a speech.

The only problem with this cunning Republican
Plan is we are
Now aware he’s the best White House speaker
Since FDR.

But the vast majority of his detractors still
Remained strangely in the dark
As he rose to every speech-giving occasion
And hit it out of the park.

It’s as if people who hated Frank Sinatra decided
His destruction they could bring
About if they got him in front of an orchestra and
Then commanded him to sing.


Monday, January 16, 2017

Stuff Your School-age Kids Will Soon Need

The Pledge of Allegiance in Russian:

"Я клянусь в верности флагу Соединенных Штатов Америки и республике,
которую он символизирует, одной нации подБогом, неделимой, со свободой
и справедливостью для всех."

Tuesday, January 10, 2017

All You Need To Know About Trump's Nominee For Attorney General

Jefferson Beauregard Sessions --- that name alone
Makes you want to punch him in the face.
You know that growing up his family said “nigger”
Far more often than they ever said grace.