The Cutoff Point

 

While he was asleep, Lorena Bobbitt

Sliced off her husband’s penis, went

For a drive and then tossed it out the

Window like it was a flyer that she’d

Found under her windshield wiper

For teeth whitening or rug cleaning.

In court, Lorena claimed John Wayne

Bobbitt persistently denied her any

Orgasms. I’d hoped the fallout would

Be husbands with unsatisfied wives

Would overnight become the most

Attentive lovers. No such luck.

*

“The MacNeil/Lehrer NewsHour” was on

Then. I sensed that Robert MacNeil hated

This story and desperately wanted no part

Of it. But the following year, 1993, when

The verdict in this case was finally going

To be announced, MacNeil had to mention

This because the Bobbits had found a way

To become legitimately newsworthy. He

Did the wrap-up on world events and then

Brought up the end of this controversial

Trial. I wondered exactly how he would

Convey the various sordid details. The wall

Behind MacNeil now was suddenly like this

Enormous dam with multiple visible cracks

And water beginning to leak out. Still, he

Single-handedly attempted to keep it in

Place and prevent the coarsening of the

Culture and harm to all things decent and 


Proper. “Lorena Bobbitt was found not
Guilty of ‘malicious wounding’ against

Her husband for severing his … payniss.”

MacNeil elected to mispronounce the

Offending word to make it seem genteel.

But the dam broke anyway as cable TV

And talk radio and O.J and Fox News and

The internet would soon wash away all of

The decorum that PBS and their flagship

News show had fondly cherished. Looking

Back, it was inevitable but I now can see

MacNeil bravely attempting to stop the tide

Like some Canuck King Canute and despite

All of my mockery back then, I now salute

Him for giving it the old college try.